'Miss You, Love You' Movie Ending Explained & Summary: What Happens To Diane and Jamie?

Grieving the loss of your loved one is an intimate affair, and you only allow yourself to be vulnerable in your private space. But what happens if your son sends his assistant to comfort you during such a trying time? Diane had recently lost her husband, Henry, to Parkinson’s. She was obviously devastated and she didn’t really have anyone to share her misery with. Although she’d hoped her son would be her shoulder to cry on, Tyler, a prominent author, is busy with work, and sends his condolences over text. Jim Rash’s Miss You, Love You soon establishes that Tyler wasn’t close to his step-father, Henry, but Diane had hoped that her son would at least be there for her, knowing how deeply she was impacted by the loss. But instead, Tyler sends his assistant, Jamie Simms, to be Diane’s support system. Can Diane open up to a stranger? Let’s find out. 

Spoiler Alert

Why was Diane offended by Jamie?

Diane didn’t know how to deal with Jamie, his constant presence reminded her of her son’s absence, and that obviously wasn’t comforting. Also, it was awkward for her to share her space with a stranger. And while Diane had the option to sending Jamie home, she chose not to do so. She didn’t know Jamie, but at the same time, she possibly didn’t mind having someone around to listen to her thoughts, although she was quite guarded at first. Jamie was ready to help Diane plan the funeral and take charge of pretty much anything that needed her attention. But of course, Diane couldn’t really cope with the fact that her son didn’t prioritize her, and instead thought that sending his assistant would just be enough. She was frustrated, angry, and devastated, but she never really expressed her feelings to her son, and every time Jamie’s phone chimed she wondered if Tyler had something to say to her. Jamie had already mentioned that it would be ethically wrong of him to share anything Tyler had said to him about Diane, and he promised Diane that he would be a cone of silence for her as well. But Diane couldn’t help but be curious, she wondered if her son thought about her at all. Jamie tried his best to warm up to Diane, and while it wasn’t pleasant at first, she gradually started to trust him a little. She’d also realized that Jamie was the only reason she got cards from her son on every occasion for the last four years. It was obvious that Tyler didn’t feel emotionally connected with Diane, and most of what he did was rooted in dutifulness. 

As a mother, it wasn’t an easy truth for Diane to swallow, and deep down she hoped that wasn’t the case. One day, when Jamie left his phone unattended, Diane went through the texts Tyler had sent him. She was shocked to learn that Tyler was done with his work, and he’d even considered attending Henry’s funeral, but Jamie had advised him to prioritize himself and had told him that being there for his mother wasn’t really his responsibility. Diane was heartbroken, she had only just started to trust Jamie and she couldn’t understand why he would try to push her son away when she clearly wanted to be with him. Jamie couldn’t really come up with any explanation that would make sense to Diane. While he was ready to leave, Diane asked him to do exactly what he’d come for. She started to leave a to-do list on the desk every morning, and Jamie was expected to get all the work done, Jamie did his job without complaining, and the night before the funeral, Diane demanded that Jamie explain the reason behind his text. Jamie repeatedly emphasized that he never asked Tyler not to come, he simply reminded him to prioritize himself. Jamie added that he didn’t think it would be good for Tyler to be around his mother, knowing the past they shared. This is when we, the audience, discover that Diane had cheated on her ex-husband (Tyler’s father) with Henry and fallen madly in love with him. Well, Tyler’s father had also cheated on her, but his affair was a fleeting one. 

Tyler was only nine when all of this happened, and his birthfather told him that he was supposed to be on his side and support him, which also essentially meant he was expected to go against Diane and Henry. Diane had noticed Tyler change very quickly, he’d become bitter about her new relationship, and he despised Henry. She felt sorry for him, because he was too young to even process what was right and wrong and he was simply manipulated by his father. Instead of confronting him or telling him he didn’t have to pick sides, Diane chose to take the high road by never addressing the problem and being there for her son always, hoping someday he would realize his mistake. Diane was heartbroken to realize that even to this day her son has an allegiance to his late father. She believed she had always given him love and support, but in exchange, all she got was neglect. She was reminded of Tyler’s father’s funeral, when Tyler didn’t allow Diane to attend the ceremony and she had to grieve his death from a distance. Yes, they’d separated, but Diane never stopped caring about him, and Tyler failed to see it. Diane tried to blame Jamie for the helpless situation she was in, but he was quick to remind her that he wasn’t the reason she felt neglected. He pointed out that Diane preferred to hold onto her anger instead of texting her son and telling him how she truly felt. She was looking for someone else to blame, and Jamie happened to be an easy target. 

How did Diane’s honesty help Jamie?

Now, Jamie shared a complicated relationship with Tyler as well. They met four years ago at a gay bar and Jamie had offered to  become his assistant and that was how they started to work together. It didn’t take Diane much time to figure out that Jamie was in love with him, even though he’d denied it a couple of times. Jamie was a 46-year-old man, and while he stated with conviction that he enjoyed working as an assistant for Tyler, she knew there was more to the story. We eventually discover that Jamie had expressed his feelings for Tyler, and while Tyler admitted that he felt the same way for Jamie, he’d also stated that he wasn’t ‘quite there’ and he wasn’t ready for a relationship. But it didn’t end at just that, on Jamie’s birthday, Tyler had told Jamie that he was open to the idea of them being together, and Jamie was really happy about it, but unfortunately the next day Tyler left him a voicemail taking it all back, stating that he actually wasn’t yet sure about their relationship and he feared that he would end up hurting and destroying their relationship. Jamie was obviously upset about the whole situation and he’d asked Tyler not to contact him, but he eventually came around, and he firmly believed that henceforth, whatever would happen between them would be on his own terms. 

We eventually find out that it had only been two weeks since Tyler and Jamie’s ‘breakup,’ and it was obvious that he hadn’t healed and was deeply in love with Tyler. He wanted to impress him, and being ‘selflessly’ there from him even though he didn’t have to was his way of making Tyler realize what he’d missed out on, or at least to make regret a little. When Diane read the ‘miss you, love you’ text from Tyler to Jamie, she realized that in a way they were both in the same boat. Tyler always used this phrase at the end of every text conversation and it was this beacon of hope for Diane. It comforted her and made her wonder if the words actually meant something to him. She figured it must be difficult for Jamie as well, considering he obviously had feelings for Tyler and the ‘miss you, love you’ kept him hoping and not giving up on their ‘friendship’. Jamie refused to be honest about his feelings, and during their heated argument, he admitted that he was the one who’d offered to come to New Mexico to assist Diane. This was obviously shocking for Diane, and she repeatedly asked him if he’d been lying to her the whole time, and if her son had ever asked to help her out, Jamie responded that it was complicated! Diane soon discovered that two weeks after Tyler broke Jamie’s heart, he’d contacted Jamie to discuss the complex situation he was in, and even though Jamie had left his assistant job, he decided to volunteer to help Diane, because he’d hoped that Tyler would realize that he was a genuinely good person who, even after being through so much emotionally, chose to be there for him. 

Jamie and Diane had pretty much taken the same route, they both refused to confront Tyler and be honest about their feelings, and instead they took the ‘high road’ and did everything right on their part, secretly hoping that Tyler would one day appreciate them and perhaps even hate himself a little for not doing enough for them. So, was it really the high road, or was it just a delayed guilt trip? They were punishing themselves in the hope that one day Tyler would feel guilty and regret his actions. Jamie thought he would move on and live in New York after helping Diane with the funeral, and everything he did was just to make Tyler regret his decision, and perhaps some day, if Tyler ever came back to him, he would proudly reject him, because then Tyler wouldn’t blame Jamie, he would blame himself for not appreciating Jamie. At the end of the day, both Jamie and Diane loved and resented Tyler and no matter how hard they tried to distance themselves from him, they simply could not. The confrontation helped Jamie realize that he was making the same mistake as Diane, and that he must take control of his life instead of making his life revolve around Tyler. 

What lesson did Diane and Jamie learn through their conflict?

Diane and Jamie ultimately realized that although they wanted to believe that they were the victims in their situations, they had to also accept the fact that they made certain terrible choices that ultimately caused them extreme pain. Diane should’ve confronted Tyler when he was nine, she should’ve spoken to her ex-husband and discussed how asking their little boy to choose a side would mentally destroy him. Instead of silently watching her son grow distant from her, she could’ve put her foot down and dealt with the situation. Instead, he held onto his resentment and hoped that one day Tyler would recognise the sacrifices she had made. But the thing is, Tyler had grown so detached from his mother, and so used to the fact that she would respond to his cold texts no matter what, that he never really felt the need to inspect what went wrong with their relationship. Both Diane and Tyler were pretending to be okay, to be cordial and nice to each other, and I believe Tyler must have wanted his mother to fight for him as well, but she never did, and they didn’t get the chance to be real with each other ever again. 

The film also explores the regret that family members often experience upon the passing of their loved ones. Diane never really wanted to move to New Mexico, she did it because her husband, an artist, had decided to paint the desert, and Diane regretted complaining about it all the time. You don’t really have to spell out your resentment to your loved ones, they can recognize it from a distance. Perhaps she regretted that Henry had seen the resentment that she had developed for him in her eyes. Watching her lover decay and die, yet being completely helpless about it, resulted in bitterness, almost as if she was blaming him, but then again she wasn’t, she simply hated the situation she was in, and she couldn’t really make peace with it. Henry’s departure was almost like a betrayal, something beyond her control, yet she couldn’t really imagine herself without him. The funeral went almost smoothly, but Diane hated the fact that Judith, the choir director, chose not to sing the songs that her husband had specifically requested her to play. But instead of holding a grudge against Judith and living with regret her whole life, Diane finally took charge of the situation. She walked to the podium and sang Barry White’s ‘You’re the first, my last, my everything’ just like her husband had wanted, and Jamie joined in from the audience. 

What does the final scene suggest?

Although Jamie and Diane had some pretty heated arguments, they never really despised each other, because they could relate to one another. In a strange way, Jamie’s decision to assist Diane helped them both heal. They had both kept their emotions pent up, and perhaps the fact that they were complete strangers helped them be honest with each other. Something that one might struggle to do with their loved ones, in fear of hurting them. Before Jamie left, he admitted to Diane that the only reason he stayed was that he wanted to fix things, he always felt the compulsive need to do so. Being with Diane was his way of living Tyler’s life briefly, a life that he wished he had. Jamie lived with the constant regret of not coming out to his parents, possibly because he always knew they wouldn’t take it well, and he waited until he turned 35 to come out, by then both his parents had died of cancer. 

In Miss You, Love You’s the ending, Diane reassured Jamie that his parents always knew, as a mother to a gay man, she knew long before Tyler came out to her, and Diane hoped Jamie would realize that, for his parents, he would always be the son who loved them to the end. Diane advised Jamie to move on, she knew this uncertainty was destroying him and she wanted him to live his best life. Jamie broke down, to have someone who actually cared about him overwhelmed him, and he embraced Diane. Tyler had sent Diane a ‘checking-in’ text, but this time, instead of responding to it in a heartbeat, she decided to take her own time. She has learned to prioritize herself, maybe she will gather the courage to be completely honest with her son and they’ll someday get over their differences! The view of the desert that once overwhelmed her, calmed her in the end, as she sat outdoors with her husband’s urn. Diane finally found the beauty her husband had been chasing, and while she had enough reasons to regret her past actions, she was possibly glad that she finally took a stand for herself instead of living with regret. Diane and Jamie helped each other heal, and the indescribable bond that they’d formed was far superior than familial ties. 

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