The struggle for a better future

Carmen was an artist. Like most, she was never satisfied.

To her, art was a language, a means of communication, a way of cataloguing life and time. There was so much to learn in this vast beautiful world that was just out of Carmen’s reach.

Like many struggling artists, money also seemed to be difficult to obtain and retain. Nevertheless, she didn’t need to explore the world for inspiration because Malaysia was her canvas and the people her ink. She went on her personal pilgrimage, journeying from the bustling streets of KL to the old houses of George Town.

Her life was full of flings and love interests, none of which lasted long. The relationships often ended after countless arguments; she never seemed able to see eye to eye with her paramours.

She remained a passionate and tormented artist and person. She lived in the moment but always worried about the future.

Pouring her experiences into her creativity, she became an amazing artist. Unfortunately, not a very commercial one. She struggled to put food on the table.

At the age of 28, she began to fall ill. Her chronic alcoholism and poor living habits had finally caught up with her. The doctors even recommended she never pick up a brush ever again.

They warned her many times; she needed to calm down, to not be so passionate, to control her emotions. She needed to stop vying for perfection in her work and becoming enraged when it didn’t go as planned.

The stress of producing each work of art had taken a toll on her body. She had cancer. If she continued with her art, it would shorten her life. That was what her doctors said.

They would have had more success taming a mustang.

Carmen’s art was her drug. Day and night, she worked for hours to produce paintings. Her heartbeat quickened and she felt some pain but tried to ignore it. It seemed to have only gotten worse with time; not even sleep could be her solace.

Carmen was spiralling to her downfall, but she didn’t really care. She completed her latest work, called “The Destruction”.

She attached a sticky note to it and looked at her painting almost intimately. A tear rolled down her cheek as she clutched her chest in unbearable pain.

She collapsed to the ground.

Editor’s note: This is an excerpt from ‘For A Better Future’ by Colin Pui. It is part of a series of short stories – What The Future Brings. The book is available at BookXcess for RM31.90.

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